All relationships will at some point experience tough times. It is during these tough times that many men and women opt out of a relationship only to later realize that they cannot live without the person they left. But whereas coming to this realization is important, getting the relationship back on its footing will require both persons to be sold out to the idea of getting back together.
This is where the often quoted expression of men being from Mars and women from Venus comes into play. Yes. Men and women approach and handle relationships in different ways. As a girl who has broken up with your boyfriend but are not sure how to get him back, one of the basic mistakes you can make is assuming that he thinks in the same way a woman does.
But take heart. You can reignite the fire and get your boyfriend back as long as you follow a number of core principles. First, evaluate why you broke up with him in the first place – regardless of who initiated the break up. If the reason was physical abuse or anything that would pose a risk to your safety, then getting back with him might not be the best idea. You must be careful to manage the urge to seek him out simply out of fear of being alone or wanting to have a boyfriend. To call it as it is, this would be selfish and cannot lead to a sustainable relationship over the long haul.
If your evaluation of the circumstances that led to the breakup is positive, then you can start to take the steps to get your boyfriend back. Be the person he fell in love with. There must have been certain things about you that attracted him to you. Be that nice, positive, fun-to-be-with person that you once were and correct any mistakes and habits you had developed that you know he did not particularly like.
Look your best and do not fall for the mistake that many ladies have made for generations – assuming that you no longer need to dress well once you have a steady boyfriend. Wear the outfits that bring out the best in you. Be careful not to go overboard as this could be counterproductive – you know the kind of attire he appreciates. A gorgeous woman is difficult to turn – even for an ex-boyfriend. Men are visual beings and how you look will play a major role on whether he will give the relationship a second chance.
When you meet or talk for the first time since you parted, the first words you say to him carry a lot of weight and will likely determine whether things go north or descend further south. Choose your words carefully but do not across as desperate to have him back. The goal is get him fired up to start the ‘hunt’ again. Do not throw yourself at him. Just be yourself and stay relaxed-even when you know on the insider you are a bundle of nerves.
Take him out to a match of his favorite sport or just for drinks with your friends so there is no pressure. During this, there is no harm in letting him know you have been thinking about him. Fondly reminisce about those special fun moments you shared. This will inevitably take him back to those days and he will start to remember how happy he was then to be with you.
Steer clear of self pity. Do not apologize for everything that happened – instead suggest solutions for the problems you had before and how you can overcome them.